i tink i'm feeling slightly tired.. like u know.. tired of being caring and trying to hold the net together.. but den again that's possibly jus my Self speaking.. i konw a lot of other pp care abt my net and all.. but sometimes i jus wonder whether my efforts are worth it. like i buy stuff for them.. and i dunno whether it works sometimes.. why should i be always giving and giving..

yet even as i type this i feel so bad.. i feel like these things aren't even stuff i wanna say.. cuz i know that it works.. i know that relentless pursuing after these relationships are worth it. seriously worth it. so yesh.. i wanna keep doing tt.. i know that i wanna model after Jesus.. and its gonna be tough like this but i'm gonna keep at it.. cuz i know His strength will sustain me. hallelujah! i choose to be joyful.. i choose to keep it up.. i choose to let my strength be replaced by His.. when mine runs out.. His love and strength will flow on forever and i wanna rest in that..

Rests...

jesus you're my banner of salvation. and i'm so thankful for that. i jus wanna run into your arms rite now and hug you cuz there's where i find my space.. where i find my life.. where i find all that i am. it is u it is u it is u. and there is no one else that can satisfy my soul the way you do. i love you jesus. hallelujah!